WARNING: SOME OF THE MATERIAL ON THIS BLOG MAY POTENTIALLY BE TRIGGERING TO SOME PEOPLE (THOUGH IT IS NOT MEANT TO BE). PLEASE READ WITH CARE.

Friday, 16 December 2011

Why do we Self-harm?

I have been told that there are 3 reasons why people self-harm:
      
  • Pain
  • Attention
  • Visual representation of how you feel


I know I don’t self-harm to feel pain. Whenever I cut myself I feel numb, I don’t feel any pain. Not until afterwards anyway, but I have a very high pain threshold. I definitely don’t self-harm to get attention. I am a very private person and self-harm for me is a very private behaviour. I don’t cut myself where people can see, and I do everything I can to hide it. Only a handful of people know I still self-harm. People know that I used to self-harm, and they can see from the scars all over my body but it is not something people ask me about nor is it something I talk about, so attention is in no way a reason for me to cut myself. So that leaves the last reason- visual representation.  

Whenever I cut myself, I like to take a photograph of the wounds at their worst. I am sorry if this sounds really strange, but somehow it helps. I am not even sure if I can explain why it helps, because sometimes seeing images of self-harm can be a trigger, but other times just seeing the wounds on my body is enough to make me feel like I don't have to do it again. I am a visual and artistic person in a lot of ways, so it makes sense to me to express myself visually and I guess that is what self-harm does. It says what you can't say with words.  In my meeting yesterday my case worker said 'When you are feeling messed up in your head, you make a mess on your body' and as she said this, something in my head clicked. When I look at my wounds that are still healing, and the mass of raised purple scars I have on my thighs and hips, I do feel like a mess. I find them ugly and unattractive and I wonder how anyone would be able to see past this mess that I have made of my body. They make me feel sad. I wish they didn't look the way they do, and I hope that they fade fast, although I know that is unlikely. However, I feel differently about the scars I have on my arms, and other parts of my body. These scars are much older, most of them about 5/6 years old. For a long time I was ashamed of these scars and very conscious of how people would react to them. I would always wear clothes that covered them up. It took me a long time to conquer these feelings and only in the last couple of years have I truly been comfortable with having my arms on show. My attitude towards these scars has really changed now. After my meeting yesterday I want to embrace my scars because they are a part of me, and each and everyone one of them represents a part of my life and tells a story. I am not in any way advocating self-harm nor legitimising it by suggesting that it is an expression of your feelings, but self-harm is my way of documenting my life. Each scar means something to me and reminds me of what I have overcome because I am still here. Which amazes me sometimes. 

What I have learnt in these past 30 odd hours is that there are other ways of visually representing my feelings on my body. I don't have to mark myself permanently any more by cutting myself.  It was suggested to me that instead of cutting I try drawing and writing on my body instead. I can use red pen if I want something that resembles blood. I could use paint. I could write those negative words that go around in my head, I could write a diary entry. There are so many possibilities and ways that I could express my feelings visually. My body is my canvas and this is my project. I hope that I have found a way to recover from self-harm, for good. The purpose of this blog is for me to document the images I make, and my journey to recovery. 

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